Dearest self

To my darling self –

You are too hard on others, and even harder on yourself. Let go of the past to focus on the present to start building your future. It’s the only way you’re going to really take the wheel of your life.

Self discovery is powerful.

Stop hanging around people that don’t care about you. You know they don’t, you’ve always known. Listen to your gut when it speaks, and you’ll never go wrong.

Focus on you and you’ll see firsthand how powerful you truly are. Don’t be distracted by others’ success – they’ve earned it by putting in the work. You can do it, too. Find what makes your heart sing and work towards doing it for a living.

Forgiveness is the answer. Harboring feelings of resentment is not healthy for you. It’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Make peace with what has happened in your life to start making it better.

Practice gratitude. Be appreciative of what you have while working towards acquiring what you want. Don’t become blinded with jealousy.

It’s okay to feel your emotions.

It’s okay to be angry. To be totally upset with the way things are going. With how you’ve been treated by your peers. To wish to be somewhere else.

It’s okay to want more out of life. To hope and dream of a better life where you don’t feel like you’re drowning.

It’s okay to not have friends. Don’t try to insert yourself into the presence of others for the sake of having fake friends.

It’s okay to be sad. Crying is a sign that you are alive. Tears are caused by emotions that are so overwhelming you have to dispel them physically.

It’s okay to be uncertain. Life is a journey that is yet to be discovered. No one has it figured out, even as an adult. If they say they do, they’re lying to you and themselves. Just when you think you’ve figured it out, something changes.

Be the best YOU.

Change is scary, but staying the same is scarier. It’s okay to make mistakes – it’s how we learn.

Learning to admit when you are wrong is a virtue. So is patience. And kindness. They will take you far if you wield them properly.

Vulnerability – as scary as it is, is the number one way to get others to understand you. It feels weird, and it’s nerve wracking, but you can’t even imagine the number of doors it will open.

Slow progress is better than no progress. Quality over quantity. Things take time, and as long as you keep with it, you’ll make it work. Rushing into things is where mistakes happen. Take your time and enjoy the ride. Look at the view and marvel in it.

Save your money when you can and don’t spend it on stupid things. Pay off your debts quicker than intended so you have money saved up when you need it most.

Communication is key. Learn how to talk when you are frustrated. It’s not you vs. them; it’s us vs. the problem. Use the “I feel” method, even if it seems silly.

A message from me to me – from my future self.

We have a home, a husband, a child, four pets, and are doing great. We have things we never even dreamed of having. We’re working on our own consulting business, and just paid off two of our loans, with three left to go.

We’re getting there, and you will too. My heart aches when I think back to all the sorrow we carried in our heart. We feel intensely, which is why we hold onto the sad. It lets us know we care, that we are alive. But we’re allowed to feel joy, happiness, and excitement, too. Life isn’t all serious all the time. Remember to let go and have fun, be silly.

Be yourself.